A few reviews and Bendis’ raping of Doom and The Avengers

Today, we review Iron Man 27, Daredevil 106, Captain America 36, Iron Fist 13, New Avengers 39, Mighty Avengers 11, and Amazing Spider-Man 554. I wish I could review more, but I’m poor. And I can’t afford as many comics as I wish I could. Hear that i.ph? I’m poor! And I review comics for j00. Let’s put two and two together, people.

In this edition, we will see how Brian Michael Bendis hates Dr. Doom, The Avengers and all those who used to like his dialouge and characterization of his other books. Yes, me and two other guys.

Okay, let’s start off with Iron Man 27. 

Now, this issue has a special place in my heart as it is pencilled by Carlos Pagulayan and inked by Jeffery Huet, both of whom I’ve met, and I gotta tell you Mr. Huet is one of the friendliest famous people whom I worship. I really didn’t get to talk to Mr. Pagulayan, but I’m sure he’s just as awesome.

This title doesn’t get the love it seriously deserves. I love how Knauf guys write IM, and the art is spectacular, especially the covers. This particular issue was great because of the characterization of Maya Hansen, Tony Stark, Tem Borjigin and Dum Dum Dugan. Seems like Mr. Stark has really gotten into the role of being director of S.H.I.E.L.D. and he’s taking control and he’s getting things done, even though the odds are against them.

In this issue, the stakes get higher. Much much higher. The issue marks a very good escalating point and is very necessary, as you can see the gears of the story turning. The story within this issue, though, it is a bit predictable, so the shocker at the end tends to not be a very good one; but that’s if you actually do predict it, like I was able to.

I give it 4 out of 5 Super Skrulls!

Daredevil 106

I am Ed Brubaker’s bitch; I seriously am. And I would suck on Michael Lark’s toes if he asked me to, so even though the art done by Mr. Azaceta is good, it’s not Lark. Needless to say, I was quite thrown off by the art.

This issue felt like a filler, as nothing extremely significant happened. However, it provides great insight into what all the characters felt and thought about the whole situation. It shows how DD’s supporting cast feels about the recent events and it shows just how far gone Matty boy has fallen. Actually, this kinda felt like an emo issue of Daredevil. Matt Emordock, huh? AMIRITEGAIZ?!

However, as everyone knows, the best DD issues come when Matt’s life is in total turmoil, and it’s really covered in shit right now, so this issue makes us look forward to the next issues.

I give it 3 and a half Super Skrulls!

Captain America 36

FANTABULOUS ISSUE, YO!!! I posted the spoilers a few days ago, and we all know it was great. The team of Ed "I can do no wrong" Brubaker and Steve "I can’t do any wrong either" Epting has been creating masterpiece after masterpiece with Captain America, pre- and post-death of Cap.

I loved this issue. There really aren’t any more words needed. The action scenes were fantastic, very fluid. The struggle of Bucky!Cap was a great touch to this issue, we can really see how he’s not the old Cap, even though he’s trying to be in some capacity. He fights dirty, and he shoots people, and I’m really digging the new Cap though I am missing Steve.

At the end are major shockers if you haven’t been spoiled by the gazillions of comic book nerds and their mothers who posted it on their blogs. Things are heating up, and it can only get better for Captain America.

I give it 5 out of 5 Super Skrulls!

Iron Fist 13

More Matt Fraction/Brubaker goodness! I only wish David Aja did majority of the art, and that’s actually what kept this issue getting more Super Skrulls, which you’ll see later. However, this title is still one of the best, if not the best title Marvel’s releasing, along with Captain America

It’s a great set-up issue, with all the stakes getting higher, for everyone. Danny gets the wheels of his revolution turning, and we all wet ourselves in anticipation. There’s action, but since Aja didn’t pencil them, it wasn’t as great as it has been in the last dozen issues. The ending just made me squeal in fanboyism, but it did feel a bit lacking. It’s like taking a deep breath to shout, then you let out a whisper, having to postpone your shout for one more month. That’s okay, though, because I’m sure whatever awaits us will be a slobber knocker! 

I give it 4 out of 5 Super Skrulls!

Amazing Spider-Man 554

Gale Force! OF GARBAGE! Okay, he’s fighting a villian no one cares about, living a life no one wants to live, and we don’t even see MJ or Jackpot. GODDAMN YOU, ONE MORE DAY!!!

Having three issues a month not only kills the pacing, reading too much of the same goddamned thing happening over and over again. The past two months is all about the public hating Spidey, with a couple run-of-the-mill villians. Son of a bitch Spider-Man, I used to LOVE YOU! Spidey, you got me into comics, don’t make me HATE YOU!

Half a Super Skrull, son of a bitch Spider-Man Brand New Day Bitch ass shit fuck!

Main event time- Mighty Avengers 11

Why does everyone talk like everyone else? And they all think like some douchebag? Ares even thought "Oh, no, Dad." Wow. like Ares, The God of FRICKIN’ WAR would refer to Zeus, as DAD. And here’s what’s worse- not once did Dr. Doom talk in the first person. WHA?! WHO THE WHAT NOW?! Doom is the MASTER of third person (thanks to Ade for the correction).

"Doom would like a strawberry sundae. Doom thinks Doom should go to the nearest 7-11 and Doom will buy one. Doom thinks that would be a good idea."

But nooooo!!!!! Bendis had to rape him by having him say this-

Okay, that was awesome, but it’s not Doom. Doom would never resort to using commoner’s insults. "Whore’s heart?!" "Cow-Mouth?!" Doom, you’re a Doom-bot being controlled by Silent Jay! Damn it, Bendis! DAMN IT!

Though, it does have it’s redeeming moment. Yes, just one. Okay, maybe two, because it’ll make you speculate. But other than that, the thought bubbles are getting old.

2 Super Skrulls out of 5!

New Avengers 39

DAMN IT, BENDIS! What the hell were you thinking!? HER!!! and HIM!??!?! Son of a… !#($!)($! Okay, that’s just the fanboy in me, but this is otherwise a very good issue.

I love Echo, she’s slowly becoming one of my favorite characters. I love how Mack gave her Native American features, because she is part-Native American. I thought that was absolutely brilliant. This issue is a great way of hyping the Secret Invasion, and lots of questions are raised. It’s not absolutely essential, but if you like Echo, this is something you’d have to pick up.

I give it 3.5 Super Skrulls, out of 5!