X-Men Origins: Wolverine Review
May 5, 2009Everyone and their mildly retarded cousins have written a review of this movie, but I would still very much like to impart my impressions of the film. Don’t worry, I’ll make it short and sweet, just long enough until your patience barely runs out on me.
Right off the bat, I can tell you that X-Men Origins: Wolverine was just “meh” for me. Okay, maybe not “meh” but more of a “meh, hm…..” because there were parts and aspects of it that I really enjoyed and bits of it that I felt should’ve been left out, changed or unchanged. Let’s start with the positive.
Sabertooth. Goddamn, Liev Schreiber brought the cunning, calculating yet brutal Sabertooth I’ve come to love. The Sabertooth from the X-Men movies (Tyler Maine, was it?) is a far cry from the quality of the portrayal of Victor Creed in this installment. Remember the feeling you got when Joker would be up in the screen in Dark Knight? Yeah, an eerily similar feeling came over me when I saw Victor on screen, because you knew someone was going to die in a claw-in-face/ throat/ spine/ spleen fashion.
Bravo, Mr. Schreiber. Bravo.
The very complex relationship between Creed and Logan was exquisitely brought to life on screen. This, I think, is largely thanks to Schreiber and the writing. The time alloted for it was just right and the opening credits scenes were fan-freaking-tastic.
Wade Wilson- No, not Deadpool- Wade Wilson. When Ryan Reynolds was cast, I thought “oh hot damn, perfect!” and for the little time that he is on screen, he did a great job at being Wade. He was witty and crazy, just like the post-department H treatment for Deadpool. I thought it was a nice touch, although not really comic book accurate.That’s fine, though. I always thought these movies existed in a universe all their own, so as long as they don’t go too far from the source, I’m fine with it.
Yeah, what the fuck is that? Anyway, more on this shit later!
Gambit- The Cajun accent was somewhat present but not too thick and overused, because then he’d sound like crazy chef on the food network. Taylor Kitsch did a fantastic job playing Gambit- he had the swagger, the badassery and the charm. The charm, as some people who live normal lives might not know, is part of Gambit’s powers- he has this charming aura that can sway women and internet nerds.
The fight scenes between Gambit and Wolverine were top notch, too. The way Kitsch fought wasn’t exactly how I imagined Gambit would fight, figuring thelatter was more of an agility fighter than a strength one, utilizing run and gun moves rather than crowd clearning.
Cyclops- Now, having him obliterate everything around him is just awesome. Putting him in a leadership position? Well, that’s just bad ass.
Now, onto the not-so-awesomes.
Action scenes were really good, though a couple CG scenes look like they’re a couple years behind the curve. However, the choreography was fantastic, especially with Sabertooth’s and Wade’s moves. I dunno, but seeing Hugh Jackman do those Wolverine-y poses and attacks made me cringe at some parts. He was too smooth and not feral enough. Then again, it could just be the shit he pulled at the Oscars.
I liked the fact that they tried to include Wolvie’s classic “best at what I do” line, but the way they did, it felt forced and cheesy.
My biggest gripe would be the members of the Weapon X program. Really, is it all that necessary to have Agent Zero? Or Silver Fox but change her powers completely? Oh, and Blob, just because? What’s wrong with having the original team together? Maverick, anyone?
I’m just bitter because Maverick’s not in it. Instead, Agent Zero and a hobbit were used instead.
The biggest and most serious offense in this movie, to me, was Deadpool. Weapon XI, my sweaty hairy nerd-induced angry balls. Teleportation, fine. Sewn mouth? What the fuck. Optic blasts? WHAT TRAVESTY IS THIS BULLSHIT!? Please, if you’re going to give us a Deadpool spin-off, make it the Deadpool we all know and love! Ryan Reynolds as Wade got too little screen time and this abomination of the Deadpool mythos gets to be the main villain. No. Just no.
As a movie, I guess it gets the job done. Hell, even with the leak, it still made as much as Iron Man during its opening. So, yeah, if you’re a big Wolvie fan, go ahead and see it. If not, get the DVD or something.
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